Captchassholes.

Captchas are ridiculously infuriating in every way possible. 

I'm having a hard time even writing this because that red squiggly line is glaring at me from under the word & I don’t want to give it the gratification of “adding it to my dictionary.”

Here are some legit examples of captchas & my attempts at deciphering them:

Thrand Pi Alpha 6 A

Half of an M 1 inverted A with 2 lines yrigam

erldep JK a bunch of people outside and their shadows are really long because its the end of the day

lightning bolt microscope cita ffec l or i ant

Who invented these things? 

(it was probably Scotty McCreary)

I get the idea, “prove you’re not a robot” blah blah blah, well, id be willing to bet that just about every robot is significantly smarter than i am & these captchas dont do anything but exemplify that fact x a billion. 

(Except i bet im smarter than Bender from Futurama but that doesnt count because he's far in the future & everybody knows that robots are going to be dumb in the future when humans start getting scared that machines are way smarter than us & might try to take over the world Matrix style.)

Wikipedia says that a captcha is good for “thwarting spam.”

Intriguing...please, tell me more about this spam thwarting.

Does it trick spam?

Does it beat spam up?

Who knows.

I sit there clicking "try another captcha" 7 million times while trying to figure out if:

is a b, or a d, or a pumpkin stuck between to sticks, and if its possible to make a pi symbol with a standard keyboard, and does capitalization matter because if it does, im pretty much screwed, and should i maybe know Latin for this? … 


...And then, i usually just give up & decide that I dont actually need whatever it was i thought i needed from that website anyway.

Captchas: one of the many ways i am constantly reminded that i am clearly not as smart as i think i am.